Have YOU experienced the magic of Bali?

Pretty sure that’s from a Yoga Barn add…pretty sure that plus seeing the photo of Eat Pray Love author Liz Gilbert on Wayan’s wall is what swayed me to say 80 bucks-sure why not!? To a reading and healing…. Yes, literally the same healer Liz Gilbert went to.  Actually, perhaps it was the human ecologist in me, but I cared way more to talk to her about how being thrust in to fame has changed her life than I did my actual reading.  She basically said it was ‘different’ …not better, but different….which is like asking a woman if she’s okay and getting a reply of ‘fine’…  But I guess if you think about the nature and origin of the work, it isn’t for show or money.  She eluded to the fact that people expected certain results from her….thinking that magically she would lead them to love or solve their broken hearts when that’s not what she does. 


Anyway my reading….the whole ‘fortune teller’ thing was a sham…she told me I was a smoker, that my parents were divorced ‘long time’, that I have been in love 6 times, that I am passive….pretty much all the opposite….she did say I had low BP and a long life line…nothing new there….also that I was a 9th generation reincarnation and that I’d marry at 35…Everyone says I’ll marry at 35, so I’ll probably intentionally place my wedding not when I’m 35 even if I did get engaged around then just to prove a point.  Everybody thinks its creepy…if it were 33 or a random number I’d think so, but 35 is a round ‘older than usual’ age…which I think is all they really see. 


So even though that was a bit odd, she ended up feeding me copious amounts of leaves and naturopathic pills in between rounds of my leaf exfoliation….yes, legitimately leaves in boiling water…she made me strip to my underwear and exfoliate my whole body with these leaves.  I couldn’t help but think in the moment “ If I were famous, I would for sure be being Punk’d right now” as I half-nakedly twisted to try and get the leaves on my mid-back.  She told me I’d be itchy at night from the toxins….that DEFINITELY happened….it felt like 10000 ants all over me-EW…I went back for a lymphatic massage and more leaves in the morning…my waist shrank 2 inches, my travel acne (thanks to humidity and pollution) Had cleared, and I actually felt amazing.  All in my head? The first 5 people I saw commented on how good I looked, including the laundry lady who saw me the day before…who knows, but for the weightloss and skin alone it was worth it, nevermind the totally hilarious experience.


Might I add….I LOVE paying 3 dollars for all my possessions to be washed, dried, ironed and folded…why can’t it be like this at home #firstworldproblems, I know.

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